A Map for Saturday

Its been ages since i've last posted. Maybe because i've been too caught up with my driving, or painting, or just plain lazy (i think this is the reason). Lately i haven't had much inspiration. But recently i caught a show on cable and it was quite nice. The show was called "Map for Saturday" and it chronicles the life of a backpacker who spent a whole year traveling around the world, roughing out the life of a backpacker. Living in youth hostels and stuff like that must have been real tough. I have no illusions of seeing myself doing anything like that in the near future. After all, i really am just living for the 2 weeks out of the year where i can just take time off work and stuff. Not that i'm working now but in the future, after i graduate. I don't think i can spend a whole year just traveling, even though there are so many places i would love to visit.

Anyway, the show kinda inspired me. Not to travel, but to live my life to the fullest. Nowadays, for the next few months at least, i can afford to live like everyday is a Saturday. Saturdays are not like any other days. Think about it. On weekdays, people have to work, go to school and do things which they may or may not really enjoy. On Sundays, even though it is a weekend, the feeling is just not there. There usually is a pall hanging over Sundays, with the troubles of the coming week looming on the horizon. Most people can't really enjoy Sundays to the fullest because of this. Saturdays on the other hand, are the most carefree days in the week. Its just after a hectic work week. The next day is a Sunday. You don't have to worry about much. Its the weekend weekend. Ah, Saturdays.

Now that my life is full of Saturdays, its time i did something about it. I'm looking for things to do. Things that excite me, things that make me want to jump up and scream. This that scare me and things that i may consider doing in the long run. I don't want to keep on being cooped up in my room staring at the computer screen, playing solitaire, watching the telly, painting etc. Its time i got out and did my thing, and start enjoying my life and my free time while i still have free time. I don't want to have to look back at this period of my life and say that i wasted it. I still have 3 months before i head back to the trenches and do battle with the books. Its time i did something about it.

Oh yeah. I'm going to London after Chinese New Year. That's all just part of my map for Saturday.

New Year, old demons

Happy New Year to everyone. Not that it is a very happy new year, but still, Happy New Year. It just feels like a continuation of the bad dream we call life. The year pretty much started out on the wrong foot for me. But yeah, a few days on and i think i may actually do fine this year, if things don't go spiraling out of control again, like my emotions. Speaking of emotions, ignore the previous post, really. I wasn't in control of myself then, just a temporary madness. Not that i didn't mean what i said, i really do, but yeah. I just wasn't thinking straight when i was writing that.

Its a new year, with new things to look forward to. I start studying in the University this year and hopefully i do well. Getting my life in order is a top priority too. I have to start acting my age and start thinking like an adult. But if i keep slipping back into moods like the previous one, i'm never going to get anywhere, which is really sad. I may have been killing myself slowly without me noticing anything. Now that i understand things better (more or less), i have to make a conscious effort to keep myself from following old patterns again. I guess that the reasons why i have been unsuccessful after so many attempts is because of this. I'm going to be 21 so i had better start acting my age.

Speaking of turning 21, it seems that people are starting to have their birthdays already. Already i've been booked on 3 days. Which means 3 presents, which means more going out of my pocket. That leaves me with almost no money to spend for the most important birthday at the end of the year. Come to think of it, what's so special about 21 anyway? Its just another year added to our ages. All i know is that i'm starting to feel a little old now, which is not a good thing because i feel like i've wasted most of my youth on nothing. Sigh.

Anyway, its kind of a tradition to come up with resolutions at the new year, and this year is no exception. So here are my resolutions, and hopefully i can achieve them.

1. Get my driver's license
2. Study hard and do well in Uni
3. Be less of a pain in the ass and more of a friend
4. Put to rest all my old demons
5. Make my peace with her, no matter what the outcome is

Ah sigh, so its another new year ahead. Maybe 2008 isn't that bad after all. Just have to look at the bright side of things and hopefully things will finally turn out good for me.