Today, Tonight.

So it all boils down to this. I officially really really really am out of words. I just can't talk anymore. We have nothing to talk about anymore. Seriously. So why do i still keep holding on, hoping for a miracle or something. As far as i know, miracles don't happen, especially to someone like me. Maybe they do for you, but that would mean we have different perceptions of miracles, which in turn would put us even further apart. We are already separated by physical boundaries and now this, the very basis of human life, communication with others. We can't even have a proper sit down and talk session where we can finally trash out our grouses. Twice it has happened. I will not let it happen to me again. I will not be the fool. I now have spending power, i now have a funky haircut and i now have the balls to stand up and say "Foxtrot Uniform! I don't need you in my life anymore!" I will not come crawling back to you no matter what because as a man, i have my pride. I have done it before, i will not do it again. Period. And if you have a problem with that, well its your fault. Do some soul searching. Oh, you can go ahead and blame me. After all i was nothing to you in the first place, just another one of the many faceless suitors you have. Bet you wouldn't remember my name after a few months. All the talk about being friends is crass. I will not be a human punching bag anymore. I will not let myself be pushed around by people like you.
Yes. Call me sore, call me cold blooded, call me anything you like, i couldn't care less. A mistake i made was to give my heart away, to get caught in the traps set by malicious beings (read as.. you know what). I won't make the mistake again. Let them come, i won't be the hunter anymore. I tired of playing the game anymore. Now you can call me a bastard too. Another insult to add to my already long list of insults.
Back in camp on thursday. Hope i can get myself back together by then.
Foxtrot Oscar.

Is it CNY already?

Yes it is. Thank God for the chinese custom of having long New Year celebrations. I get 6 days off from camp. I can't even count that with the fingers on 1 hand. Haha. The only bad thing is that after i go back to camp, i got IPPT and field camp. The little ironies of life.
Anyway, the new year stared out rather good. Especially in the gambling. From a borrowed 2 dollars (didn't have any money in my wallet), i earned 20 bucks, in just under 2 hours. Beat that.
The past few days though have been bad. Do you ever get the feeling that you are alone in this world with no friends. That has been a rather common feeling for me over the past few days. Its like, though i have friends in camp and stuff, but the outside world feels so far away. Kind of reminds me of a song by Staind. Anyway, i've had enough of feeling like that. What i'm going to do now is focus on myself. Operation 'Six Pack', Operation 'Flying Wings' shall now go into full swing. Thanks to the Army, these things are quite possibly achieved.
You leave me no choice. If you don't want to talk then its fine. Call yourself friends. I don't need friends like you. This is all i got to say to you people out there.
Foxtrot Oscar! (FO, go figure)

The slackest week.

Back. For 6 days this time. Feels good to finally get a good break from hectic camp life. Always the same. Wake up, crap, crap, even more crap,then its off to bed. It's like that, 17 hrs a day, 5 days a week. The only break in the routine is on book out day. There would always be a scent of freedom in the air, the expectation of getting on the penguin ferry to get off the god-forsaken island of tekong. The problem comes when the sergeants decide to give us a farewell gift of push-ups and a bit of hair dryer treatment before we go. But once that is over, FREEDOM!
Anyway, this must have been the slackest week i have ever spent on tekong. 5 and a half days on the island, and i was slacking for 1 full day. It goes something like this. I was called up to attend an Air Force interview for the position of a C3 Weapon System Officer. So dressed up nicely in my Smart 4, went to the confrence room, saw it was full. The people there promised to interview us that day, before lunch. Lunch came and went, still no interview. At around dinner time the officer came up to us and said that he couldn't accomodate us that day and to come back another day. My jaw dropped. I had just managed to legally skip my first day of training without being sick. Haha. Anyway, i signed on again for the Navy, this time to be a Naval Officer. Maybe i will get another chance to slack around again.
It was an okay week this time round. Spent most of my time in the air conditioned comfort of the Individual Marksmanship Trainer. I think i'm a little cock eyed. Can't seem to shoot straight. Got to work on it if i want to get to OCS. Cannot be a wowo king.
The next few weeks are going to be hectic; field camp (7 days of shit, no showers, crappy food), SIT test (held over the weekend, another round of confinement), Grenade live throw, Live range (over 2 days, not much sleep or rest), IPPT (can't do pull-ups anymore, wonder why). All over the next 2-3 weeks. But after that, its going to be fitness all the way for me. Aiming for a silver in the IPPT test on the 24th of Feburary. After that, I will be more or less quite free.
Ok. Enough said for this post. If anyone reads this, i need help on how to create links and to fix up a tagboard. I'm too lazy to learn it for myself and i don't exactly have alot of time on my hands.

Confined no more!

I've done it. I've actually survived 11 days confined on that grotty little island known as Tekong. It must have been the longest 11 days i've ever had to go through. Reville at 0515, lights out at 2215, the same old shit continued 11 times in a row and you can get real sick of it. Furthermore, the last few days training was all physical. So it was running and running and running... And to top it all off, even more running. My legs hurt. Ok, there are some other programmes scattered around too. Footdrill (i hate it), Technical Handling of the M16S1 rifle, Individual Fieldcraft, First Aid etc. And then there was the concealment test which i failed miserably because i hid myself so well that i coukdn't see anything more than 5 meteres in front of me. And then there was the SOC lesson. I couldn't get over the wall properly so i had to do it over and over again. I must have jumped over the wall 10 times before my platoon commander was satisfied.
Enough of the shit. Here is the best part. I reported sick and got 3 days of light duties, which equates to sleeping in the bunk for the whole day, with a smattering of other activities such as talking cock with the sergeants, cleaning the toilets, cleaning the company office and setting up waterpoints all over the island. And i thought i was supposed to be resting in bed.
Anyway, during the course i've made many new friends and some new enemies as well. Its not that i don't like these people, its just that their attitude pisses me off. So basically is that i hate them and let's just leave it as that. My buudy is a little weird too. Everyone calls him "Commando' because he seems to be able to do anything (except march properly). And he's crazy about signing on, not to the Airforce or Navy, but the bloody ground pounders of the Army. How sad a life can you get? Imagine spending the next 20 odd years rolling around in the mud, camo on camo off, and digging your own toilets. Not my kind of life.
Got to book back into camp tommorrow at 2000 hrs. Sian. The weekend is too short to waste in front of the computer. I'm going to rack up some sleep time. Till the next book out!!

P.S. The next book out is going to be 6, yes count it, 6 days long!! Yippee!!!! Its nearly a full bloody week! YEAH!!!

The first book-out!

Yeah! Today is a public holiday and i get to book out! Woot! Bad thing is that i have to book back in tonight at 2000 (8pm for the uninitiated). Sian. Feels so good to be back home, even if its just for a day. Problem is my next book out is 2 weekends away. Haha. 12 days straight of torture on the arms, legs and everywhere. The number of pull-ups i have done ver the past 5 days, if it continues at the rate it is going, i will have arms twice as huge as when i came in. Haha. But that's besides the point. Army life isn't that bad. Its just different. And i'm still holding my pink IC. Haha.
This is going to be a short post. I promise a longer one the next time i book out. Anyway, to the guys going to enlist later this month and in April, i only have this advice. First, make sure you are physically fit. Secondly enjoy yourself as much as possible now, or you may end up in a real bad state during BMT. That's all i got to say today. Think i'll go take a nap....

11B anyone?

Tommorrow is a big day. Tomorrow i trade in my nice pink coloured I/C for an ugly green coloured 11B, with a mug shot of myself and some stupid smart card shit. To the uninitiated, the 11B is a military identification card which stinks. And i won't get to see my lovely pink I/C for the next 1 year and 10 months. Yup.
Well its ok, seriously. The army ain't all that bad, once you get past the crazed officers and even crazier NCOs. Just hope that the time spent away from family and friends won't affect my relationships with them, especially my friends.
Oh well, what can i say. Its been a fun 18 years, now i'll spend (or waste, depending on how you look at it) the next 2 years of my life in the military. After that its to the university and beyond. Who knows what the future holds? To all my friends, i'll never forget you guys.
Now i'm just rambling, with no coherent links. Who cares. Oh and sorry about the template. Haven't yet figured out the html shit. And i don't have anymore time left to do it. Haha. Post will be less frequent, but i'll try to post every other week when i book out of camp. Haha.
Take care everyone, and God have mercy on me. Haha.

A late new year post

Happy New Year to all you people out there. Though its a little late, who really cares right?
Before talking about the new year, i want to reflect a bit about the past year: 2005. On a whole, it was a great year. I've finally finished 12 years of formal education. Yipee!! And for the first time in my life, i didn't have to wake up early for school today! Yup. 2005. A great year on a whole, even though it had its ups and downs (sometimes more down than up). Actually, it would be better if i took the years in JC as a whole. JC was all new experiences: new friends, new environment, new types of people (the opposite sex) and much much more. I could say those will be the best years of my life. The crap i did with my friends, the problems we shared and the cursing and swearing which would inevitably follow after every other sentence. Yup. I'll always remember those days.
Now to 2006. The Army beckons. National Service is a mandatory blah blah blah... I've heard enough propaganda to last me a lifetime. Just want to get it over and done with. But i still want to have a good NS experience so i'm going in with a positive attitude. Just smile and do your push-ups! And by my calculations, after serving 1 year and 10 months in the army, i should ORD on the 5th of November 2007. REC liao! before ORD liao!
The promise of a new year. A fresh start. New opportunities. Time to forget the tribulations of the past and look forward to a bright future ahead. Hope things work out this year.
Here are some of my resolutions

• Get into Officer Cadet School
• Enjoy the Army
• Learn to drive
• Have a happy and stable relationship with all my friends
• Make new friends
• Get a six-pack and maintain it
• Spend more time with my family

Yup. My resolutions for a new year. Cheers!
Peace out!