Butter and Cheese

Ah.. The long weekend is here again. 3 days out of the army, 3 days of more than 7 hours of sleep. Most importantly, 3 days closer to the time i pass out as a Corporal. Yeah. Who cares if i'm not booking out next weekend. Doesn't really matter cos i don't really have much to look forward to over the weekends. I really don't know what there is to look forward to over the weekends. Seriously. It seems that all my friends are only there for the instant i know them. After that they just seem to vanish, disappear, like mist in the morning sun. Am i that repulsive a person that the only time people whom i call 'friends' is when they don't really have a choice? I mean like if that is the case, its better if i never existed in the first place. Is that how it is meant to be? How the hell would i know. I spend almost the whole week in a place i would rather not be. Who knows what people are doing behind my back, the things they say about me.

Anyway, why should i care? After all i never really existed to them did i?

I'm going to stop blogging for awhile, trying to look for the answers. Sometimes i feel like this stupid thing actually hinders any progress to be made by me. I haven't abandoned it, i'm just leaving it to fester and rot for a long while, maybe a month or 2 and see what happens. Maybe i'll figure it out, maybe i won't. Maybe i'll be killed in next weekend's live firing (accidents do happen). Maybe, maybe, maybe. All the maybes in life. Hah. Why should i care anymore?

Foxtrot Oscar. For a long while.