Brief Lives

The average age a person lives (at least for a guy) is what, 75? Well that boils down to 900 months, 3900 weeks, 27300 days, 655200 hours, 39312000 minutes and 2358720000 seconds. 18 and a half years gone, and i've wasted 222 months, 888 weeks, 6753 days of it doing nothing that is really helping me get anywhere in life. When i see sucessful people, especially people in my age group, i feel a sense of loss and of jealousy. I wonder where i have gone wrong, what they did which i didn't do. I wonder why i waste time chasing things that don't seem to offer me any returns, yet i still do. Why? Maybe its because i'm a hopeless romantic, or maybe its because i hang on to things too much. Maybe its because i'm condemned to live a life of mediocrity. I need to break the chain but i can't. Life's too short for me to go about worrying about all these trivial things. I'm trying to return to the life i used to live in Secondary school, free of worries and of cares, bothered only with covering my own ass, and having fun at the same time. It seems that that is the best way for me to go. I was happy, sucessful, respect then, before shit started falling from the sky, when i became a nobody. was it a mistake to go to CJ? Maybe it was. Would it have been better if i had gone somewhere else? I doubt so. No looking back i promised myself, just like i promised not to think of her, but is till do. I need time to sort it out. I've been taking alot of time and it still hasn't gotten any better. Where have i gone wrong?

• Miah: No, i don't need WoW. My subsricption ends this week. Don't get corrupted by the game. seriously, for your own good.
• Ching: I don't feel the force right now. I'm not superman and i have never been. Never will be. You take care of yourself in infantry term
• KP: Thanks for the invite on Saturday. Appreciated it though i was far down on your list of people to invite. It gave me a cahnce to get out of the house and for a moment, forget the problems i have been facing. Great concert by the way.